My boss' voice literally gives me gas
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Randomize
