he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Rumble strips road head = magical
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
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