T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
