I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Randomize
