Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Randomize
