What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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