I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize