Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Randomize
