yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
