I just made out with a guy for $7.
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Randomize
