yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
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