new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
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