You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Randomize
