oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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