i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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