I hope mine doesn't look like that
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
you will always have a special place in my vag
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Randomize
