Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Randomize
