why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
