It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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