Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
He? As in you personified your dick?
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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