Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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