i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
time to smoke my breakfast
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
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