There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
