I wannas sexs uuuuu
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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