I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
