i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
