high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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