just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
