i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
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