If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
