Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Drake has all the answers
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
