Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
