:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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