I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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