Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
Randomize
