I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
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