I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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