Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
