bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
