that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
