My pussy is not your playground.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
i think my cat just said my name.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
Randomize