If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Randomize
