the new term for farting is butt boxing.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
