hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Randomize
