happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
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