She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
lol hangovers are for mortals.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
