making cat noises will not fix the situation.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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