Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
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