what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
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