Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
