my room smells like sperm. sweet.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
