I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
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